Do you ever stop and think about how many words come out of your mouth in a days time? How many different topics did you discuss with people throughout your day? How many of those topics or words were life building, loving, meaningful words? How many were pleasing or not pleasing to God? Did you speak truth today? Was that truth wrapped in judgement or love? Did the person you were talking to feel loved as you spoke to them, or did they feel condemned? It is true that you can't control the way something you share with someone is received by them, but you can control that way it is delivered by you.
Today I wanted to challenge anyone who reads this to think about the saying "speak truth in love". To many times we use the excuse "I was just being truthful" to attempt to get by with saying something hurtful, condemning, or judgmental....but what was really more important in the conversation, getting what you wanted said said, or having them receive it because your words were wrapped in love? The bible talks to us a lot about our words and the power they have to tear down or build up. Matthew 12:37 says "For by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned". This is something to think about when you start to open your mouth. The person you speaking to is not the only one listening to the words coming out of your mouth. When you have said what you had to say, will God look at you say they were justified, or condemning? Before you answer that, remember what all God has forgiven you for, and then ask yourself again how much right you have to justify the things that you said? I know that might sound a little harsh, but this is one of those moments that I want to speak truth...in love. I am challenging you to look inward, not outward. If you had to justify what you just said to God, instead of to the person you spoke them to, could you? God is the one who knows everything we have ever done....and everything you haven't done when you should have. So if you feel like letting words fly out of your mouth that may come across as condemning to to someone, ask yourself if you could justify condemning them to God? Or would He say back to you, "Please let my Holy Spirit be what convicts them, and don't let your words be what condemns them. If they hear love come out of your mouth, then they will see Me in you...and that could change everything".
This is a topic that means a lot to me...why, because out of all the things I have done wrong in my life, this is by far one of the things that is at the top of my list. I put truth before love far to many times when I was speaking to someone I had conflict with. And you know what I learned from that...It just let to more conflict. When we experience the true grace and mercy that God has for us, and we realize, truly realize, just how much He has forgiven and washed away from our past, then we can approach even the toughest conversation with grace, mercy and love. Why is this? Because God will put a check in our gut that says "who are you to condemn them? I didn't condemn you when I had the chance...I forgave you and loved you. And that is what made you love Me more. Do you want them to know Me and love Me, then let them see Me in you".
I know this is a tough pill to swallow because people can do some pretty hurtful things for us, and the first feeling that can come to our flesh is just how justified we are to say what we really want to back to them. But is the thought that is making your flesh rise up coming from God, or the enemy? When you can get honest with yourself and say "these thoughts, these feelings, these words I want to say, are not from God. I need to submit to Him before I go say anything to them", God will change what you want to say. Since I truly surrendered my life over to God some of my best responses to people have come AFTER I took it to God in prayer. Let me just tell you from my own experience, it is really hard to justify harsh words to someone after you just came out of prayer with God about it. Am I saying you will always get it right, no, but I am saying that the more you practice letting Him work through you, the better you will get at this.
Pray, submit, speak love, speak truth, use life giving words and watch what God can do that you can't do on your own. He will amaze you, and He will bless you for it.
Proverbs 18:21 - "Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruit."
More Scripture on our words:
Ephesians 4:29, Psalm 14:19, Matthew 12:36, Proverbs 25:11, Proverbs 16:24, Proverbs 29:20, Ecclesiastes 10:12, Isaiah 55:11, Proverbs 10:19
God, thank You for addressing this topic in Your Word. Please help us seek You before we allow hurtful words to come out of our mouths. Holy Spirit, help us to always speak truth IN LOVE....remembering that LOVE is the most important part. And help us use words that give life, not death, to our conversations. In Jesus name, Amen
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