Do you ever wonder why in our 'humanness' we have the hardest time giving the very thing we need to most from God. By that I mean Forgiveness, Grace and Mercy. Yes, I know it can be hard for us to humble ourselves and ask God for forgiveness, grace and mercy, but eventually we usually end up at that place. And the moment we reach that place... our prayer...our cry out to Him...is that He will be there to offer those things to us.
Now, take that same scenario and place it between 2 people and the entire structure changes. Our human side wants to throw in a sense of entitlement. Like we are entitled to not have to forgive them because they did "that" to us. We want to be the judge and the jury when it comes to needing to offer forgiveness to someone who has hurt us. And if forgiveness isn't hard enough, now we are expected to show them grace and mercy too? To the person who has wronged us....hurt us...or maybe even continues to hurt us?....And the answer to all of that is...YES. Yes because of what it does in our own healing, not because they came asking for it, not because we think they "deserve" it, not because we are letting them "off the hook", not even because we are saying what they did was okay. But because we are to mimic the behavior of Christ, and it is what He does for us every single day of our lives.
Not forgiving someone eats away at our soul. It causes bitterness in us. It changes us and causes us to put up walls and barriers to protect ourselves from never letting that "thing" happen to us again. And usually makes it difficult to be in a trusting relationship with friends, family or a spouse again. Holding unforgiveness toward someone will always do more damage to you, than to them...no matter what you are telling yourself. This is not my statement, but it is a true one.....Harboring unforgiveness toward someone is like drinking poison and expecting it to hurt or kill the other person. It won't! It will only hurt or kill you!
Forgiving does take getting to a place of saying "God, I trust your justice more than the worlds or my own. I trust that I can lay this thing and this person at your feet, release it and let you be the judge over it. You are a just God and I trust YOU." Those are not easy words to say when the pain is deep because they once against need you to place your trust in someone other than you....in God.
Forgiveness, Grace and Mercy do not mean that you will put yourself in a place where you let the person hurt you again and again. You may have to pull away from that person if they do continually hurt you just to stop yourself from getting hurt more. But not out of unforgiveness....out of Godly wisdom. But God will show you that too if you trust Him. The main thing is that in your heart...truly in your heart....you are releasing it to God, saying I forgive them, letting God know you are not going to harbor this in your heart any more...and then really letting go of it.
The Grace part is you saying I'm not going to treat you..or give you...what "I" think you deserve. I'll trust God with that too. And the Mercy part is coming to the place where you find it in your heart to pray for that person... hoping that they too will find God's forgiveness, praying that He will change them...and praying that He will bless them.
God, do a MIGHTY work in us when it comes to forgiveness, grace and mercy. You have already given us every example to follow, now help us humble ourselves to DO the very things we know Jesus did....forgive, show grace, show mercy, show love...show You in us. In Jesus name, Amen
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